old friends

Today I have been thinking about someone who I let slip out of my  life. Quietly, slowly; it was almost unnoticeable. I think Robert Frost kind of knew what I'm feeling now. 

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.

From what I've tasted of desire

I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice,

I think I know enough of hate

To say that for destruction ice

Is also great

And would suffice. 

I've had many relationships end in fire; a big fallout with a lot of heat and a lot of destruction. I think the few that have ended in ice make me the most unhappy though, because the days grew colder and things turned to gray, with out me even noticing that summer was fading to a cold and dreary winter. I hope that one day that the sun will shine on this winter, and some of the ice may melt, because I sure do miss the kid. Robert Frost was right, the ice suffices, but the memories before the ice might be just enough to melt it. Unlike the damage done by fire, the damage done by ice may not be permanent. Looking back on some of the times we had together, I want to post something that he said to me once, because it makes me smile and reminds me how much we cared about each other. 

"I see a girl who has changed an incredible amount since we first met. I see a very brave, very sincere, very loving girl who I feel extremely lucky to call my friend. I see a girl who is just trying to find her place in the world and who never ever thinks about herself. I see a girl who has more strength and courage than anyone else I have ever known and probably ever will know. I see a girl that I love with all my heart." 

I hope that you're doing well dear friend. I sure do miss you. 

friends and missionaries

On Sunday, I said goodbye to my best friend Cali for 18 months. I can't believe that the time has come.  My dearest friends Daysa and Val are soon to follow. These wonderful girl are inspirations in my life, and it's weird to prepare to see them leave. I don't know if they know what a profound difference they have made in my life. From sleepovers, to adventures, laughing together and crying together, from chicken nugget Thursdays to Saturday temple trips, from college to missions, we've stuck together. You girls have changed me forever, in the most complete way possible. I am a better person because you all are in my life.

Time, I beg of you, please go by fast, 18 months feels like forever! I feel an odd mixture of emotions. I'm so excited for them, but at the same time it's hard to shake the feeling that I'm being left behind. :/ Here's to hoping that 18 months doesn't change everything, and that it changes everything. (;

A friend is one of the nicest things you can have, and one of the nicest things you can be. 

No Poo

Alright readers,

I've been hearing a lot about this new craze of "No Poo!"- washing your hair with out using shampoo. I'm a little skeptical but I'm going to give it a shot!

I found a recipe that I think will work for me:

Mix 1 tbs of baking soda with 1 cup water in a spray bottle.
Mix 2 tbs of vinegar with 1 cup of water in a separate spray bottle.

Wash your hair with the baking soda solution by spraying your roots and scrubbing. Massage it into your scalp but don't put it all over your hair. Then condition your hair with the vinegar solution by applying it to the length of your hair, avoiding your roots and focusing on the ends. Rinse it all out and your good to go!

I've started this week, and I'll let you know how it goes in a few days!

this week

gah.

this week i have been sort of a hermit. if i wasn't down at the gym working out; which i was... like 90% of the time, then i was trapped in the library doing homework. seriously though i have been so busy.

tomorrow marks the return to school from a three day weekend; a three day weekend that i spent working on...you got it...schoolwork. living at college makes three day weekends feel completely wasted. :/ puh.

this week also marks the beginning of my gluten and dairy free adventure. yay. :/ let me explain...so i have been having a lot of weight gain lately. no change in diet, huge increase in exercise. you would think my body would go the other way right? WRONG. 35 pounds heavier than i was three months ago, the doctors figured something might be wrong. so my blood-work is being done. in the meantime, Jenny (the trainer), thinks that i could have a gluten or lactose intolerance. so...almond milk and gluten free bread for me. (; maybe i can find some yummy recipes for gluten free brownies or something. wish me luck!

anyway that's it for this week. pretty lame and boring, but so goes the life of a studious college girl! 

more to life

tonight i was sitting at a party with a group of friends. 

they were playing beer pong, and drinking wine, and the usual weekend events were occurring. and i just sat there and thought to myself..."why doesn't anyone realize there is so much more to life than this?" 

people are so much more than they give themselves credit for. :/ i just wish i could make them see it. i know that i have had a lot of self confidence problems in the past. i still have a lot of self confidence problems that i'm working on every day, but i've never been to the point where i thought that alcohol and drugs were the answer to my problems. 

let me tell you friends...they aren't. the answer that is. 

every single thing that our Prophet, Thomas S. Monson, asks us to do, will only make us happier. sex, drugs, alcohol...all things that complicate our lives. education, sobriety, and charity...all things that simplify our lives and make us grateful for the things that we do have. 

stay sober kids, you won't regret it. 

xoxo,

the mormon girl 

inspired

welp.

i miss india already. earlier i was thinking that if i could hop on a plane and return today i would. then i really got to thinking.

it's not necessarily india that i miss (don't get me wrong i miss my friends and the kids...bad) but i think that it's the way i felt in india that i miss. i stopped thinking about computers and social events and how my hair looked (mostly) and what clothes i was wearing and who's dating who and all the other crap for just a little spurt of time. i thought about others, and not in a superficial way, but a truly deep and constructed manner.

so i'm going to bring back that feeling. i'm volunteering to tutor every monday. i'm volunteering at the homeless shelter every saturday. and i'm going to find more to do within my community.

i don't have to be in a third world country to make a difference and to feel happy. 

i can do that right here, and i hope you know that you can do the same.

xoxo,

inspired

a little more india

today has been my favorite day in India so far. i guess i keep saying that about every day, but each day i keep finding it to be true. today started with a bull race for the festival, Pongol! a bunch of men gathered together with bulls that had decorated horns (with chalk and flowers and other such things) and at 11:15, they let the bulls…well…run. it was all so hectic and on some psychological level maybe a little scary… one bull ran right behind me and Lauren was freaking out! also for some reason people were throwing bananas everywhere. i got hit a few times but Lauren was covered in banana, so much so that her white shirt was yellow!

after the bull race, we each went to a Mohanam villagers home for lunch. Kimiko, Kay, and i went to Madhu’s house. (: he climbed a coconut tree and got coconuts for us! it was kind of amazing! we met his sister who is beautiful, and an absolutely amazing artist. she has a degree in philosophy and is getting a PHD in physical education. we ate our meal on banana leaves, and with our hands (only the right one of course). yes mom, i AM playing with my food and it’s even socially accepted! the food was absolutely amazing. i could definitely live this way (though i do miss meat and i keep finding myself craving beef jerky).

after Madhu’s, we went to the cultural center with the kids. they taught us a sport called caperty(?), which is an odd mix between football, wrestling, tag, and sharks&minnows. i taught them the boot scootin’ boogie, they taught us some stick dances and Indian dance moves. while we were dancing, a little girl came up to me. she asked me to sing here a song, so i did. then  i taught her some handshakes and patty cake and down by the banks and after that we were inseparable. her name is Lagita, and she introduced me to a bunch of other little girls (though she hardly spoke English so it was a challenge!). the other girls were older and spoke English very well, and kept teaching me Tomil words.  they took me to the kolam contest, the stone lifting contest(150 KILO rocks!), and the greased pole climbing events in the village for Pongol. we danced and played games and the little girls took about 100 pictures on my camera! (: it was a beautiful day. i never want to leave this place. i know that I have to come back, and soon. there is a whole world out here that i never could have imagined, and i just want to be a part of it.

i love India. i love the people, the culture, the land, the food, and especially the children.

we ended the night with another campfire with Balu (our organizer) and Pascal (the Swiss man who lives in Germany). it was a beautiful night with wonderful company and food. i hate to think my time here is running short.

wait for me India, i’m coming back soon. (: 

Me and Logita (: 

People watching the bull race.

Me and some of the kids!

Logita's mad picture skills!

Kolam contest